Friday, June 26, 2009

Day 18 - A Visit to TheKitschEnd

It has become obvious over the last few days that there is more to our grumpy old Morris than meets the eye. Unfortunately, for Monster Big Brother, Kelvin isn't much of a talker. So, we sent one of our researchers to TheKitschEnd to see if we could find out more about our socky mystery.

We were lucky enough to run into the village loudmouth a delightful young lady, who gave us information which may 'shed' some light on the secret being kept between Morris and Kelvin. To protect her identity she would like to be referred to as Neaputella.

MBB: Hello, we were wanting some information about brown sock monsters and being a brown sock monster yourself, we wondered if you might be able to help.

N: Sure I can, I'll do my best, but you must understand I'm not one for spreading gossip.

MBB: What can you tell us about your hair colour?

N: Well, mine's green, as you can see. The rumours about me being a natural pink head are COMPLETELY untrue. I am totally au natural. Well there was that one time that my boyfriend, Peanut, he took me to a Thrilly Idol concert for our anniversary, which was very sweet of him don't you think? and I bleached it so that I could look like Thrilly, but we got thrown out of that one because Peanut is just so loud he was singing over Thrilly and Heave Heavens guitar. 11 was not loud enough, let me tell you (She now stops for a breath)

MBB: Well actually, we were referring to brown sock monsters in general.

N: Well, as I said, I'm a natural green but you can also be a pink head or a purple. My friend at work from the next street over, she has green hair too but it's all light and looks like the pond water she spends most of her day in.

MBB: And what about orange?

N: No she's not got orange hair...OH, you mean do brown sock monsters have orange hair? Well, I'm not supposed to say so you won't tell anyone will you? I hate gossip but you this isn't gossip is it? You asked so nicely. WELL, if you see a sock with orange hair you need to look out. Watch out for weird things happening 'cos they're not monsters at all. The clue's in the colour. I was mistaken for a brownie myself once, but the idea of me doing something helpful? I'm just too busy to have a 'thing' that I do which "helps" loads of people.

MBB: One last question. Do you know this man? (Shows picture of Morris)

N: Oh yeah, he's the baldy that lives round the corner next to that other one that's on Monster Big Brother too, the one that helps cats out of trees. He's a grumpy old fart. Personally I want Ganymede to win; he's so horny. Peanut gets dead jealous when he's on screen; keeps going on about how short he is. So yeah, Ganymede, not Morris, barely got a hair on his bald old head, too old to on, didn't some shoes go missing?...And they came back fixed?...AND he's got...


N: Got to go. My poor Footsie's got out again.

So, what can we gather from our little trip? Morris and Kelvin have a few more questions to answer...

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